Every now and then I hit upon something that I know
is a good idea. And, though this doesn't happen very often, this is
one of those times. There's no way around it: decorating your kids'
rooms with their help is a great opportunity for you and for
them. Oh, I know there are lots of little bugs in the idea and
potential complications--but that doesn't change the fact that it's a
good thing to do.
Taking a
room that was decorated with younger kids in mind and turning it into
"hip, way cool pad" is a great way to let your kids know that YOU know
that they're growing up. Taking down the wallpaper borders of stuffed
bears and turtles and replacing it with something more age-appropriate
will make your kids feel important. And involving them in that process,
seeking their input and listening to their suggestions will make them
feel that they are on the path to growing up--they're actually an active
force in the creation of their new room.
Surprise Makeovers are Cool on TV, But Not So Much In Real Life
If
you still need convincing that it's a good idea to involve your kids in
the process, then think about it this way: on TV, surprise makeovers
are cool. They really are. But that's because we don't normally watch
the recipient of the new room beyond their initial reaction. We see
them when they first whip off a blindfold and stand blinking and
squinting in the bright lights as they try to take in their new
surroundings. Everybody's happy and giggly and the show ends. We don't
see the couple standing there 12 hours later, now that the cameras and
energetic TV personalities are gone, staring at the new walls and
wondering what happened and how anybody ever thought that bright orange
was a good look.
Your kids feel the same way about their room as you would about your home. Their room is their space--their world away from the world, especially
as they get older. Just as you wouldn't likely appreciate it if your
husband or your neighbor just dropped by one afternoon and repainted
your living room in colors of their choosing, neither will your kids
necessarily be receptive to the changes you bring about one day while
they're off at school. Your vision for their room isn't necessarily
their vision for the room. You've got to make it your goal to discover a
mutually acceptable vision.
Involve Them, But Remember Their Limitations
To
that end, involve them in every aspect of the process. Take them to
the store and let them look at colors. Let them flip through wallpaper
books and mural books. Let them explore the world of Faux Painting.
However, make sure that you keep the outings short and sweet--no
marathon shopping trips that will frustrate and wear your kids out.
Remember that their attention spans are not like yours--keeping the
trips to a limited amount of time will make sure both of you enjoy the
outings. And don't forget to think bigger than just a trip to the paint
store or the furniture store: try to tie your decorating trips in with
a nice dinner out or something like that.
Taking
the kids to the paint store and listening to their suggestions and then
taking them out to dinner will be one of those special moments kids
remember. If you treat their opinions as valid options and listen to
their thoughts and take the time to discuss things with them over
dinner, they will start to feel like an intricate part in the decision
process. And trust me, I may have young kids and I may not have had
much experience in the world of psychology, but I know this is a good
thing. You don't have to be a genius to see that by involving your kids
in something so small as decorating their rooms, you're basically
telling them that their opinions matter and that you value their
thoughts.
What If . . ?
Alright,
now you're probably thinking that I'm living in a world where
everything is puppy dogs and lollipops. Sure it sounds good to involve
the kids in the decorating process, but what's going to happen when they
pick out Sponge-Bob Yellow and Bright Red for their walls? We'll cover that in the next post.
No comments:
Post a Comment